Sometimes you just stumble into greatness

I spent several hour this evening trying really hard to kill some plexers. I fit up a scanning boat as well as refit my trusty tristan several times. No dice. Just when I was about to give up I ran into a Taranis. He was about 30k from me. I warped to a plex at 20 and he was on the other side. His ship name included "rails" in the description. So I figured he might have them but it could also be an attempt to deceive me. At this point I didn't care either way. He did have rails. He begins kiting me. I hit the AB and approach. Shortly thereafter he dips within 10k and I scrammed him. The crying started immediately, with him claiming that I hacked EVE. He probably just ran into the gate. If he had spent less time crying in local he might have killed me. At one point I was down to about 20% armor. If he overheated his railguns and flew to minimize transversal he might have gotten a couple of lucky shots. Here was the local chat.

[01:53:21] EVE System > Channel changed to Local : Ouelletta
[01:59:53] StevieTopSiders > hacker
[01:59:54] StevieTopSiders > quit hacking
[01:59:57] StevieTopSiders > fucking cheater
[01:59:58] StevieTopSiders > reported
[02:00:00] StevieTopSiders > for hacking
[02:00:02] StevieTopSiders > enjoy your ban
[02:00:03] StevieTopSiders > o6
[02:00:07] Ri'an Tivianne > MAD HAXXXSSSS
[02:00:31] Kelleris > gf
[02:00:36] StevieTopSiders > fucking hacker
[02:00:38] StevieTopSiders > wasn't a good fight
[02:00:40] StevieTopSiders > you hacked
[02:00:44] StevieTopSiders > scrammed me at 20km
[02:00:45] Kelleris > wtf
[02:00:50] Kelleris > no i didnt
[02:00:53] StevieTopSiders > yeah you did
[02:00:55] StevieTopSiders > hacker
[02:00:58] Kelleris > u r a retard and flew w/in 10k
[02:01:01] Ri'an Tivianne > LOL
[02:01:03] StevieTopSiders > not true
[02:01:04] Kelleris > not my fault you fail
[02:01:06] StevieTopSiders > u hacked
[02:01:09] StevieTopSiders > I was manually piloting
[02:01:12] Kelleris > fine, report me then
[02:01:12] StevieTopSiders > no way I got in range
[02:01:14] StevieTopSiders > you hacked
[02:01:16] Ri'an Tivianne > mmm... sweet tears
[02:01:24] StevieTopSiders > sorry that some people use skill
[02:01:26] Kelleris > you prob bumped off the gate like a noob
[02:01:27] StevieTopSiders > instead of client injectino
[02:01:28] StevieTopSiders > to win
[02:01:41] StevieTopSiders > your a noob
[02:01:42] StevieTopSiders > and a hacker
[02:01:46] StevieTopSiders > cus only a noob would hack
[02:01:50] StevieTopSiders > nice try though
[02:01:54] StevieTopSiders > now I'll know never to fight you again
[02:01:56] Kelleris > ok. well put in a petition then
[02:01:57] StevieTopSiders > o6
[02:01:58] Kelleris > ok
[02:02:03] Kelleris > pls report me
[02:02:19] Kelleris > my CEO is Rixx Javix
[02:03:23] Ri'an Tivianne > that was so full of win
[02:03:28] Kelleris > for sure
[02:03:33] Ri'an Tivianne > good job Kelleris
[02:03:45] Kelleris > that retard hit orbit and i bounced him off of the gate
[02:03:50] Kelleris > thank you sir o7
[02:04:17] Ri'an Tivianne > o7
[02:05:15] Kelleris > it happed alot like the great station bumping incident of 2012 Kill: GenAtal (Republic Fleet Firetail)
[02:05:17] Kelleris > LOL
[02:05:40] Kelleris > doesnt matter how fast your ship is if you hit a solid object
[02:05:48] Ri'an Tivianne > lol that will teach him to just slap the orbit button
[02:05:56] Kelleris > no it wont
[02:06:02] Kelleris > apparently i hacked
[02:06:04] Ri'an Tivianne > nice tactic, I wouldn't have thought of that in a million years
[02:06:06] Kelleris > hes blameless
[02:06:18] Ri'an Tivianne > you can bet your ass I am gonna try it when I get a chance though lol
[02:06:30] Kelleris > actually this time is was an accident, but that retard doesnt need to know
[02:06:36] Kelleris > ;-P

Killmail

I thought my fun was over. I went and did some laundry. When I get back I see there is chatter in corp about an Orca in Hevrice. I grabbed the Vexor and warped to the belt. We were all kind of in shock. I saw a writer from a well known eve news site in local, so I assumed it was some kind of live stream trap/prank, but hey, it's just a Vexor loss if it goes wrong. It wasn't a setup. We were all kind of in shock. As near as I can tell it was a ratting Orca. Got the pod too. I'm still scratching my head.

EFT on the Orca fit. I'm being generous on the drones because I don't remember what he was using.